You on the other side of the glass, of my memory's museum...

Good morning pimps and pimpettes. Going along with the title of this here ya dig I've started, today I bring you a (hopefully) weekly edition of Random Rants.


a.) What was handed to Chris Brown was a bit much...compared to what other futhamuckas have received after beating their women REPEATEDLY, including endangering the life of children. If it wasn't Rihanna, I don't think his punishment would have been as much. I'm not condoning D.V. in anyway, but I'm just saying...

2.) My grandmother tells me THEE funniest stories about me as a child. Today's story: At the tender age of 3, while visiting a family friend, I had on sandals and my feet got dirty. I went to tell my mom and she said "Get over it!". Luckily, Mei-Mei* had my back...and we went to wipe off my feet. If it wasn't for that save, I would be walking around thinking it's ok for my feet to look like this:

c.) I got my first tat back in May! The whole time I was getting tatted, I had THEE ugliest frown on my face saying "I'm not doing this again," but secretly plotting on where the next tat was going to be. I've decided...hand prints on the butt cheeks!!!**

iv.) I love Beyonce, but she bogus for the "I Am..." concert being the same as the "Beyonce Experience." Either way, I'm still buying the "I Am..." DVD when it comes out. Call me ka-razy if you want...cuz I don't know karate.

5.) The following phrases/words irk me!
  • "I got so much swagger, I swear swagger tryna sue me" [side-eye to Weezy]
  • "Get it in..." [What is "it"?]
  • "I'm going ham..." [Still don't understand the metaphoric use of "ham"]
  • "She's such a ham.." [So she likes to sit on the table, honey glazed, with pineapples on top]
  • Hubby [What is he, a lost Teletubby?]
  • Wifey [Darn you, RL!]
  • Pineapple [OK, not really]
f.) I think folk should give props to people who aren't married with kids, instead of side-eyeing asking what's wrong with me because I'm alone. Alone doesn't equate to lonely, numbnuts!!! You think it's easy filtering through the shullbit that comes my way as a single woman everyday in the 21st century? Why can't I have an "Not having a wedding" shower or a "not having a baby" shower? HEH!?!? Where's the gift registry for the single folk, Wal-Mart!?!

VII.) I don't care for all the hype about Amber Rose (And please, don't try to elaborate), but seeing her stomach motivated me to get back on my abdominals, son! lol

8.) Saturday marks the 4 year anniversary of when Hurricane Katrina hit the Gulf Coast. I was in New Orleans for Mardi Gras and STILL saw some of the effects of the storm. I didn't make it to the 9th ward, but I wonder what it looks like now...

I.) My girls and I came up with this theory after we graduated from college and it hasn't been proven wrong yet: If a man is at least three years older than you, he's mentally as mature as you are. Waiting for someone to prove this theory wrong...just once!

X.) I know I'm not the only person who feels responsibility is nonexistent when returning to the university from which they've graduated. I make my return to my Alma mater this weekend and I must say..."Keke" will make an appearance.

That is all, for now. Feel free to share any random rants you may have! Post it in the comments section of the blog (facebook lurkers) and make me look important feel special. lol j/k

Naw, I'm fa serious. lol j/k

Ok, I'm not j/k


*Mei-Mei is my divalicious grandmother. And she doesn't give a hoot what you think of her because: "I'm 71-year-old...I'm just happy to still be here!" Some of my spunk comes from her....
**Kill yourself if you thought I was fa serious!

K to the...

Fookery for your Friday!

I've said 25,896 times before, and I'll say it again...