"...to the east side"

What up, y'all! I don't know what it is about the month of March, but it's definitely been March Madness for me the past three years, and I'm not talking NCAA. Well, this year's March Madness was me finding a place to stay. My lease ended on March 31st in the place unaffectionately known as "Baby Stateway Gardens" in the luxurious South Shore neighborhoood. I was there a total of three years, and thought I'd be there longer than that. However, I knew in May 2010, I wasn't renewing my lease. Lemme tell y'all why I didn't renew my lease.

  • I dealt with mice…TWICE! And it wasn’t during the time of the year when mice usually appear when they are trying to find some cover from the cold. NAW, these bastards were around when it was warm. Neither Mickey nor Ben's names were on my lease, yet they were up in there like they paid rent.

  • I dealt with roaches. Not so much in my apt, but in the COMMON AREAS of the building. Someone moved out of their apt and there were roaches all over the damn building. For me to have to scurry pass the elevators to avoid seeing a roach is just...ugh. Call me "bourgeois" all you want. I grew up in a house where I only dealt with spiders and ants. I don't do roaches!

  • There were about 9 cats that roamed the parking lot of my building. There was a man that came out everyday and fed those cats; even during a thunderstorm (I seent with my own 4 eyes). He was so attached to the cats, he even noticed when one went missing. These gangsta auss felines would also walk on folk's cars in the lot, including mine. I had a piece of a cheddar biscuit chillin on my windshield wiper one day and was befuddled. I'd even had paw prints on my windshield.

  • I dealt with people who can’t park. There are two lines your car should be parked in between. I was parked between two people who didn’t understand this concept. If my hips were wider and thighs were bigger, I wouldn’t have been able to get in and out of my car everyday. Also, someone parked in MY spot, one day, so I was forced to park in theirs. However, they left ME a note saying to show some respect. What?

  • I witnessed two carjackings in a 10 minute period from my living room window…AFTER hearing gunshots fired at a police officer. I saw the whole thing, picked the guy out of a line-up AND testified before the grand jury. Yep, I’m a snitch.

  • Three of my visitors have had their cars vandalized.

And all of this happened during the 3rd year of me staying there. So yeah, it was time for me to go. I have moved on up (well, down to the first floor) to the East Side (literally, east of Chicago). And I love it. So hopefully, the only pests I'll be writing about are the ones I see OUTSIDE through my patio door. :-)

K to the...

Cubicle Chronicles 5.5.11

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